A collection of things I thought about this week, brought to you in “fun size” packages (because my thoughts are not profound enough for full size or king size posts.)
Erica Kane or Your Jewish Grandma
Lately PJ has been acting like a Bubbe (Jewish Grandma) and pinching everyone’s cheeks. She pinches out of love, sometimes, and I picture her saying, “Shana punim.” She also pinches out of anger, spite and control (probably not what Bubbes do).
Then, the other day, she hauled off and slapped Little Dude across the face. Ever see anyone do this in real life? I don’t think I have. Don’t worry, Little Miss Erica Kane got a big time-out and her favorite pink overalls taken away. While I doubt the “real/fictional” Erica Kane ever wears pink overalls, I think punishing her by taking her favorite item of clothing would be a pretty smart parenting move.
Please understand I do not find PJ’s burgeoning violent streak charming. I find it infuriating and frustrating and depressing which is why I am devouring discipline books and trying to establish order. But sometimes you have to laugh through the tears.
Better Futures Adoption Services (BFAS) an agency operating in Ethiopia has been officially closed down. There are kids left in limbo because of this situation, which is tragic. However, it is shocking to me that this agency had any clients at all when their reputation as unethical has been well established for some time now.
It is tough to chose an agency, but some parts of the choice are NOT THAT HARD. If you read multiple complaints against an agency, cross them off your list and move on. If you are not old enough to discern between sour grapes and legitimate complaints, you are not old enough to adopt.
I have fairly lame internet skills and didn’t know anyone personally who had adopted from Ethiopia when I started my journey. Within a few weeks of gathering data, I already knew at least a half dozen agencies that I could easily cross off my list.
I am sad for the children who are trapped in no-man’s-land. But I am also happy to see some of the safeguards against corruption are working (at least in this case). I do not know that much about this story, but it is clear that someone with authority took allegations seriously, researched them and ultimately put an unethical organization out of business (at least temporarily).
A few nights ago I had a strange dream. Actually I have strange dreams almost every night (go figure), but I only plan to tell you about a specific one (hey, maybe I could start a second blog “The Strange Dreams of a Semi-Feral Mama). SAG and I apparently hired a surrogate to carry a child for us. The surrogate was a friend of my parents. He was a man. And, of course, he was in his 70’s. He walked around with his shirt off and his balding head, prominent nose and baby bump. The thing I love about dreams – I was thinking about his nose, not his uterus.
I didn’t give the dream much thought except to laugh at the absurdity. We are not considering having more children, let alone surrogacy. But just now, because of what is happening with my friends over at God Will Add, and because of some other random comments I was reading on a different blog, I thought, what if that man represented God. God as a surrogate, bringing us another child… hmmm…
Now is when I find out if my husband is still reading my blog…. Are you there, SAG?
Don’t worry, Honey, I am still an agnostic, and still
totally overwhelmed happy with TWO children.