What’s Up – Fun Size

20 12 2011

Fun Size Posts – Where my thoughts are not developed enough to be regular or king size.

Inertia – the desire to blog but the inability to get started because a blog at rest stays at rest.

Why Target Is Stupid – They don’t sell workout wear large enough for the people who really need to work out.  People whose asses are the exact size of my ass.  Thanks, Target.  Guess what?  Walmart sells it, and they call it a Large, so I feel skinnier and actually go to the gym.

A Weekend WithOUT Children – Yes, SAG and I had one.  In Houston.  As guests at a surprise party for my best friend.  It was awesome.  I ate a ton of Tex-Mex.  Our kids did just fine without us (the first time for Little Dude, the second time for PJ.)  I stalked Ethiopians. I tried a new approach instead of Selam-ing them, I Amasayganalo’d them.  As per usual, they were kind and patient with me.

Life Without A List – If I don’t have a to-do list I just bob around in the waves.  No direction.  No forward motion.  No sense of satisfaction when I actually do something and don’t have a place to cross it off.  When I finish this post I am going to make a list.  The first item on the list will say “Make A List.”  I always do that.  It makes me feel good to be able to cross it out.  The second item will be, “Write a Blog Post.”  Yep, my to-do lists are sometimes retroactive because it makes me feel good.

Holiday Cards – I sent out more than 60.  I hand delivered almost a dozen.  I have received less than 10.  The people on my card list are obviously assholes good enough friends with me that they know a card is not important in maintaining our relationship.

A Christmas Miracle – While we have been trying to develop an elaborate plan for months, we haven’t ever gotten past the first or second step.  Our goal to have our kids go to sleep in their own beds actually resulted in both of our kids going to sleep in our bed (clearly the wrong direction.)  Then both of our kids sleeping on an air mattress in the room now designated “the kids room.”  My chiropractor enjoyed this stage of the plan as it resulted in me having lots of neck pain from laying with them on the air mattress.  Yes, the plan keeps going the wrong way and we are completely at a loss with what to do next.  My fear of messing with Little Dude’s attachment helps to keep me paralyzed in this area.

Then, last night (because there was a hole in the air-mattress and we weren’t sure what else to do) we put our kids in their individual beds, sang a song and walked out of their room.  Something we haven’t been able to do with PJ in about 18 months.  Something we have never even thought of trying with Little Dude.  Guess what happened – They stayed in bed until they fell asleep and only came into our room in the middle of the night.

Usually I lay with them until they are asleep.  This takes at least 45 minutes on the average night.  It is possible that I just got 11.4 DAYS added to the next year.  A true Christmas Miracle.

The End Of Perfectionism – Releasing this quickly-written, poorly-crafted post into the blogosphere in an attempt to get inertia back on my side.  After all, a blog in motion stays in motion.

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12 responses

20 12 2011
Captain Murdock

SFM – I have missed you.

1) I totally make retroactive lists because it does feel good.
2) You should really put visiting me as thing to do #3. I still have some Ethiopian goodies for you.
3) You looked gorgeous in your Holiday card, and seriously sorry for messing up your ratio of cards received:cards given. Maybe you just have a higher population of slackers for friends? I’m assuming you are NOT counting the email “card” I sent you in your stats.

20 12 2011
Erin

Well *&$#@. Now I can’t finish reading your blog b/c I need to go mail the holiday greetings burning a hole on my counter. Thbbbbt!

20 12 2011
Kim

oh how i love to-do lists.
and perfectionism is overrated.

20 12 2011
Tesi

preach to #1. Love it all.

21 12 2011
motherparadox

Oh yeah, I always throw a couple of already finished tasks on my to do list. That is a no-brainer. Hallelujah for small miracles such as children sleeping in their own beds.

21 12 2011
Karen

I’m reading (at skating lessons and during nightly Wild Krats viewings) a book called Time Management for Creative People — and in the to do list section it does actually say to make the first item “make a list.” So you are on to something!

21 12 2011
Meg

If you posted your home address on the internet, I’m sure you’d receive more cards. Just a thought.

21 12 2011
Shiloh

I was kinda worried we were going to have to have a funeral for your blog, oh and mine too! Maybe I’ll test out the inertia theory on my blog. 🙂 My Christmas cards are darling, if I do say so myself. I’d mail one to you, if I knew your address. So, if I don’t get that, you’ll just have to pretend you got it and you can tell me how cute Jenna is when she acts like a doggie.

22 12 2011
Cazadora

I sent you a card and I AM an asshole. Self-admitted. Hey, last night I drank so much eggnog that I farted in the middle of the night. Or “tooted” as I prefer it be called, cause it’s cuter and does not have as much smell baggage associated with it. Occurred to me that if all else fails, you could tried that cousin-of-the-dutch-oven maneuver with your little precious ones in an attempt to get them to stay in their beds.

Snarling the feral snarl with you, Mama linda.

22 12 2011
Ingrid

I have struggled with Target and pajama pants. ALWAYS too tight around my thighs. My gorgeous, perfectly wonderful and curvy thighs. Bastards.

My card better have gotten there today. Or tomorrow. Or maybe Saturday.

22 12 2011
Ingrid

And also. Why in the hell am I not on your blogroll? RUDE.

5 01 2012
Shari

I am on my way out the door to Target. After making a detailed list (yeah for me) that I will invariably add 10+ “needed” items to as I wander, and printing coupons, I feel like I should boycott. But since I spent a lot of time on this list/coupon printing I will still go…but know that inside I am mad at them for their stupid workout clothes.

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